Ogres Have Layers

So, the other day I was watching (or I should say listening to) Shrek in the car while the family and I were driving somewhere and I heard a dialog between Shrek and Donkey, where Shrek explains that Ogres are like onions, in that they have layers. Unlike Donkey, who wears everything on his sleeves, (or fur I guess).

Well recently I have been dealing with some "layers" of my own. About a month ago Carrie Pollock, the head of our prayer ministry at the church, told me about a philosophy that a famous preacher from the early 1900s named Smith Wigglesworth had. His basic goal in life was that everything that wasn't "Jesus" in his life would be melted away, so that all that would be left when people saw him was the Jesus in him. With this goal he regularly fasted, prayed, and preached with boldness everywhere he went.

Well, after that conversation I started asking God to work on me too. I asked him to start showing me the things in my life that need to be addressed. One of the first things that I realized I needed to deal with was my approach towards food. Gluttony is my sin of choice; comfort food being my drug of choice. So I started working on that and am glad to say I have lost like 13 pounds already. I have fallen in love with going to the gym again, with the goal of being around to see my grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

So then, just as I am focusing on the whole food thing, another "layer" got presented to me. I am a very competitive person. I enjoy playing football, softball, golf, fantasy football, video games, and anything else that can be somehow turned into a competition. But I am especially competitive when it comes to flag football. In fact, there have been several times when I had to go back after a game and apologize to someone on the other team or to the refs for my bad attitude during the game. Well, last week I discovered something even deeper related to this. Last week I was at my son, Eli's, baseball game and I became "that parent". You know, the obnoxious parent who cares more about his kid winning than the kid does.

So yeah, there I was at a little league game, complaining when the coach moved "our best player" to a different position that was not advantageous to "our team securing the victory". I cheered like a maniac when Eli got a hit, and I was sure to offer corrective instruction when he did something incorrectly (by yelling it from the bleachers where I sat). As my wife lovingly pointed out, "Freddy, relax, they are a bunch of 7 and 8 year old's. Do you realize how you are acting?"

Later that night when I brought up my frustration with the situation (even though Eli's team won both games and he went 5 out of 7 batting), she began to quote back to me some of the things I had said and asked me to consider how the others kids parents might have felt if they had heard me. For example, "They need to put _______ back on first base, instead of ______. He is our best player, and we are giving up to many plays at first base."

Ouch! Getting a "layer" peeled off doesn't feel good. Vulnerability and self-examination can be pretty painful. But there I was realizing I had acted like a jerk. Now the deeper question....why?

It was through this inner searching that God showed me (with the help of my wife), that I have become one of those over-compensating men who was trying to capture the glory that they were not committed/disciplined/ or skilled enough to capture as a youth (football). And I have become one of those overcompensating dads who is trying to be over-involved for his kid (Eli's baseball game) out of the hurt that my own parents were never involved/ supportive/ or available when I was involved in sports as a kid.

All this to say that as I recognize these deep rooted issues, I have the opportunity to address them. I got to have a long talk with Eli, and I apologized to him for my behavior at his games. He smiled at me and said, "Well dad, you can still yell out the encouraging stuff. I still need encouragement you know!" LOL. That kid is sharp! So we now have I deal. I am allowed to say, "Good job, Nice Try, Almost", and even, "Run Eli", after he gets a hit (since he forgets sometimes to run right away). But I must reserve all my "pointers", and "helpful tips" for after the game or during practice (per Eli, haha).

As far as football and my involvement in other sports I have decided that if I cannot keep a healthy attitude I will just need to stop playing that sport. I will play sports, but they will not play me :)

I think the biggest thing I was reminded of through this whole thing was the power of being able to apologize to our children. Our children know that when we are obviously wrong about something whether we admit it or not. When we apologize to them we demonstrate that we care enough about them to address our wrong behavior. That means something to children. Even little children. God showed me that I was actually teaching my son the process of repentance by demonstrating it in my own life. Man, that is exciting!

First read the previous post

Then, you should read this one. Talk about a praise report! This past weekend we had one of the largest offerings in the history of FLC! Our offering was just over $30,000! What a blessing!

God is so good! It is interesting to me that in the four year history of our church, 3 of the 4 biggest offerings ever have come in the past few months, while we are in this "Great Depression". We havent done a "Financial Sermon Series" or a "Tithe or Die" sermon either :)

Selah.

The Year of The Lord's Favor

So, this year at our annual Elder Retreat God showed us that our focus for 2009 would be Luke 4:19- "To proclaim the year of the Lord's favor." The funny thing about this is that it was about 3 months before all of the "recession/depression" talk hit the air waves.

Today I was with a group of pastors who meet in Richmond once a month called the Innovative Church Network. I was introduced to this group a couple of months ago, and look forward to continuing to grow in my involvement with this encouraging group of pastors from around the state. Well anyway, this months topic was about how to fund growing ministries in a declining economy.

Everyone is facing an increase in need and a decrease in resources. So what are we supposed to do about it as followers of Christ? Why on earth did God speak to our heart to spend 2009 proclaiming the year of the Lords favor in the midst of a financial crisis like America hasn't seen in most of our lifetimes?

Because he is still on the throne and his promises extend beyond any economy, any crisis, and market shift, and any political landscape! That's why!

Today I heard a lot of ideas about how churches can respond to the shift in the economy and how it is impacting the offerings. As I listened I considered the fact that two weeks ago, during a sermon series about expressing our faith at work (not a stewardship Sunday or sermon series about money) Freedom Life had one of its biggest offerings ever. It wasn't planned. It wasn't sought after. It just happened. I believe this is the reality of standing on the promises of God.

There is no need to worry, no way to plan. Just rest on God's promises and practice the principles of reaping and sowing. As long as our church does this, we have nothing to be concerned about because God is the one who is left in charge of our bills. As long as I do this, I have nothing to worry about, because God is the one who is left in charge of my bills.

So how do we respond to the economic downturn? I believe we bust out the checkbook and purpose ourselves to give even more! That's my two cents (cheesy pun intended).

Some people call that prosperity theology. Some people call it the "American Gospel." Whatever. I call it a Biblical principle found all over the Bible! The spiritual law of reaping and sowing. I call it gas lasting longer, and the fridge having food in it. I call it freedom from financial turmoil and debt. I call it the best retirement plan on this planet. I call it moving from glory to glory through the blessings of a Daddy who owns cattle on a thousand hills!

Why? So that we can be "the lender and not the borrower" during these difficult times. So we can "give to each as they had need." So we can be a source of encouragement and strength to so many who are searching during this "crisis." So we can be a witness of unprecedented generosity during this countries greatest hour of need. So we can get over ourselves and use our blessings to be a REAL blessing to others so that they would, "see our good deeds and praise our Father in heaven" (Matthew 5:16).

That, I believe, is a way to Proclaim the Year of the Lord's Favor in the midst of the Nations Crisis. It starts with us getting over ourselves, it is empowered by us getting on God's economy plan, and it is carried out by us offering the blessings we receive to those in need!

OK, gotta go check my stocks on yahoo now, bye....just kidding :)

The Cure for "Center of the Universe" Syndrome

So I was thinking this morning about how so many people in our society today have gotten trapped in the "center of the universe" syndrome. You know what that is right. It is that mindset that seems to brainwash us during our teenage years when we become convinced that the world revolves around us.

Well, in the past, people have grown out of that around the time that they graduated high school and realized how much bigger than them the world was. Unfortunately, that doesn't seem to be the case anymore. All you have to do is venture to your local fast food restaurant to see how apparent this syndrome is in our society. Not sure about anyone else, but it has gotten to the point where I feel like I am asking the person working the drive-thru for a personal favor when they take my order. And heaven forbid I have to change the order because one of my children changed their mind. First you here the loud sigh, followed by, "Look man, just pull up to the window." That is actually code for, "We are going to spit in your food now!"

So anyway, this morning I realized that I have discovered the cure for this plague. Having babies. Well, you see, it was very cold this morning and after crawling over Ty to get out of my bed (he decided last night that he needed to sleep in my room; sideways with his foot on my neck apparently), I jumped into a hot shower. Ahhh, 15 minutes of peace and quiet after unknowingly sharing my bed with one of my three kids.

You see, every morning I wake up with anywhere from 1 to 3 of my children crammed right next to me in the bed. They are smart. They have learned that if I am still awake when they try to sneak in I will carry them back to their own beds (where they are supposed to sleep). So now, they have adjusted the internal mechanism that wakes them up at night, so that they don't sneak into my bed until I am far too asleep to wake up. So then, around 4 or 5 a.m. I wake up because Kaelin, or Ty, or even Eli are telling me to stop snoring so they can sleep. WOW, didn't mean to impose. As if this wasn't enough, even though I have a king size bed with enough real estate to sleep 15, they always, yes always, end up crammed right next to me (usually one on each side), forbidding me from rolling, adjusting my covers, or even stretching. I am a roller! I am a cover-adjuster! I am a stretcher!

So anyway, back to this morning. I had snuck away for a warm shower on a cold morning. My 15 minutes of peace and quiet before the chaos of the day. Well, as any smart person knows, the key to a warm shower in the winter is no ventilation fan and a water tight seal on both the bathroom door and the shower curtain. So, having spent exactly enough time in exactly the proper water temperature to transform my restroom into a sauna, I approached the exit plan of phasing from hot water to misty room. Step one of the exit plan- unseal just enough of the shower curtain to grab the towel and then quickly re-seal the curtain after the towel is in hand. Step two- dry off all water, preparing for a smooth transition into the steam phase. Step three- slowly open the bathroom door after fully dry, allowing cold air to intertwine with the sauna air as your inner temperature adjusts to the "un-sauna" air of the rest of the house.

Well, there I was, wrapping up step one of my morning escape into "Freddy-ville", preparing for the critical transition into phase two when I heard the dreaded noise of someone fiddling with the doorknob. That someone stood about 2.5 feet tall. I could hear the door swing fully open, and then little feet scampering into what was previously my steamy oasis.

"Daddy, you take shower". Ah, the familiar voice of Ty-Ty, my soon to be 3-year old son. "Yup. Close the door son!" was my loving reply. I couldn't see it, but I imagined all of the steam rushing out the door and all of the cold air of winter flooding in around Ty's little body. "Daddy, you all done?" Now he was just mocking me, I'm certain of it! "Yup. Did you close the door yet son?" Then, to add insult to injury, I heard those little feet scamper off....but no closing of the door!

Welcome to reality. There is no "Me-ville" with babies. The cure to "Center of the Universe Syndrome".

Jehovah Rapha

One of the Old Testament names for God is Jehovah Rapha, which means, "the LORD our Healer". I love this aspect of God. I am so thankful for all of the healing that he has brought me through in my life in various ways. Healing can be such a point of discussion in the church today, and often, I think we make it more complicated than God does. Today, I had an opportunity to talk to my son, Eli, about healing.

We were on our way home from running an errand and he was very quiet in the back seat. He hadn't been feeling good all day and hardly ate anything for lunch and was complaining that his stomach was hurting. Well, we were almost home when he began asking me how far we were from the house. When I looked back I noticed that he was gripping his stomach and tears were coming down his face. So, as any loving father would do, I put on my NASCAR hat and made it home in record time. Upon getting home, Eli asked if he could go lay down and take a nap (which he never does). He started crying again saying it hurt, so I asked him if he wanted me to pray for him. When he said yes, I explained to him that Jesus had the power to heal his body, and that he was going to wake up feeling just fine.

So I laid my hands on his body and commanded the pain and sickness to leave him in the name of Jesus. I had full confidence that Jesus was going to show Eli that he was the Great Physician, so I told Eli after praying for him, "Eli, Jesus is going to show you that He is your healer, and that he answers our prayers. You are going to feel perfect when you wake up because God is going to heal your body and remove this pain."

Well, he fell asleep right away. I went into the living room and started watching some college football. About 20 minutes later, Eli came walking down the hall with a huge smile on his face. "He did it," he said, "Jesus healed my body! I feel great." I smiled and hugged him and asked him if he wanted to watch some tv with me or go back to resting. He said, "No, I'm good. Let's watch some tv." I had a big smile on my face as we walked down the hall thinking about how my young son is learning about His Savior more and more each day. Then Eli looked up at me and said, "Wow Dad, that was quick," and we sat down to watch tv. As if this moment wasn't special enough already he looks at me and says, "Dad, your good!" LOL. I explained to him that Jesus is the one who is good, and that we can all do that if we just have confidence in Him to do what He said He would. Theology lesson done, we kicked back and watched some tv.

Purpose Driven Bedtime

So last night I couldn't sleep. Random little known fact about Freddy...I hardly ever sleep very well, but I dream every night, and remember most of them. Kind of a contradiction I know, but that's how I roll. So I am sure someone in blog world is psychoanalyzing that right now...hehe.

Ok, so last night...I went to bed around midnight. Gave up on trying to fall asleep around 1:20 and decided to turn on my tv and see what my tivo had recorded. Well, there was a NatGeo documentary on there about kids trying survive L.A. gang life. It started with the story of a guy who got shot by a rival gang and how all of the people at his funeral were sad, but also very nervous that a drive-by shooting would take place during the funeral. Talk about rough. Well, it went on to say that even though he was in his twenties, he left behind 5 children. It showed his oldest daughter (probably around 9), looking into the casket and saying goodbye. Tear-jerking is an understatement! Then it went into the story of how this murder sparked a gang war that led to over 30 people being killed over the next couple of months. It showed how gangs are multi-generational and how kids grow up hating rival gangs because of violence inflicted on their loved ones early in life.

This made me think about the five kids the murdered gang-banger left behind. They will grow up knowing that a rival gang member killed their father. They will grow up continuing the cycle of hatred and violence that they have known all of there life. What really hit me the hardest was the last 30 seconds of the documentary. It went back to the funeral that began the documentary and showed the dead mans youngest child, a little boy about 3 years old, standing by the casket saying, "Let me see my daddy. I want to see Daddy!" When the family member near him picked him up, the child began saying over and over again, "Wake up! Daddy, wake up!" When this didn't work, he began shouting it louder, "Daddy, please wake up! Wake up Daddy!" Watching this broke my heart, as I considered how the memory of that moment would shape and mold that young child's life. After crying and praying for that child for a little while, God brought something to my mind....my children.

God reminded me that I also am writing a legacy on the hearts of my children every day. I got out of my bed and went into my boys room and just watched them sleep for a little bit. As I looked at Ty, I realized that he looked about the same age as the little boy in the documentary. I went to his bed and just laid my hands on his little head and began praying for him, and for the future God has for him. I thanked God for blessing me with the opportunity to help mold and prepare Ty for the calling that God has placed on his life. At one point Ty woke up, saw me praying for him, patted my arm and said, "Hi Daddy, I love you," then rolled over and fell back asleep. That is a little moment that I will remember for the rest of my life.

After I prayed for Ty, I went to Eli's bed and did the same thing. He also woke up at one point and said, "Hey dad, thanks for praying for me" and also rolled over and went back to sleep. LOL. Then I went into Kaelin's room. As I prayed over her, she laid there sleeping. Just as I was finishing, she opened her eyes, grabbed my arm, pulled me down for a hug and said, "I love you dada", rolled over, and went back to bed.

As I walked back to my bed, God whispered to my heart, "This is the most important purpose you have in life...to prepare these children for the plans I have for them. What I will do through them will go beyond anything you can imagine, and far extend everything I will do through your ministry. They are the most important ministry I will ever call you to. You are writing a legacy on their hearts that will impact more than you can imagine." I became very emotional as I considered the three little gifts that were sleeping across the hall, and that God considered me faithful enough to have this role in their life. Then God said to me, "This is the memory that they will grow up remembering, that they woke up and their dad was praying over them as they slept!" I hadn't considered that until that moment. After that, I went back to my room and fell right to sleep....until Ty came crawling in my bed half an hour later...and then Eli came in around 3:30am complaining that his legs were hurting (growing pains). I guess we all still get growing pains of different kinds. So I gently rubbed his legs until he fell asleep...just as God had gently rubbed my heart until I fell asleep.

Perspective

So a couple of weeks ago the stock market took a big hit and I happened to notice that I lost about $950 that day in my investments. I was a little disappointed until I noticed that I had won in all three of my fantasy football leagues that week! Then I was excited. Chris happened to be in the office with me as I was going through these discoveries and he started to laugh. I didnt even think about what was really impacting my mood until he explained how funny it was to watch me go through these discoveries. Then it hit me...I wouldnt have it any other way.

I was reminded of the passage when Jesus says, "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." I was excited when I realized through Chris' observation that playing fantasy football with my friends has more control over my emotions than the "recession/depression/need for a bailout" ever will. Ultimately, I have the joy of knowing that because I live by God's economy, I really dont have to worry about what is going on with my investments on any given day. As long as I continue to invest into His kingdom first, I will never do without!

And of course, we all know that the importance of bragging rights in fantasy football for an entire week is far more important than the recession. LOL. Honestly, I praise God that my retirement rests in his hands, and more importantly, that my day-to-day provision is covered by his desire to meet my every need according to His riches and glory...and according to the most recent news flash, God's account hasn't been impacted by the recent stock market issues :)